top of page

Rite of Passage ~ Hand Parting for One Half by Eva

I thought it would be interesting to do a ritual for those who did not have

an amicable separation - because, let’s be honest, at the end of an intense

relationship, there might not be good feelings. Even when the relationship

ends with both in agreement, both people may never wish to speak to one

another again, but hurt feelings remain. Even if it was you who initiated the

separation, ending the relationship leaves a hole. This is a ritual designed for

a small group of people, closest to the X, the person “of honor”.


Note: For the sake of ease of writing, I am assuming we are working with a cis-

gendered, hetero female. This ritual however, can easily be adapted for all gender

identities and preferences.


Setup:

Altar decorated with lots fresh flowers (lotus, rose, or pink flowers in

general), pink and green crystals (healing ones, such as rose quartz, jade, pink

tourmaline, etc.), lit candles in joyous colors (yellows, reds, oranges, perhaps),

willow branches, lit incense (lotus, preferably, or rose), peacock feathers (if

possible), a bowl of rice as offering, pre-made black tea (hot or cold), cups for

each person attending, small bowl of water, scissors, glue stick, poster board

or large piece of cardboard, markers/crayons /colored pencils, etc. Pink

origami paper (the larger the better). A cauldron or other fire-proof container.


Each person should also have a good size photo of themselves that they

can cut. The main person, X, needs to have a photo of themselves and their ex

- preferably in the same photo, but not touching one another.


The group gathers in a circle around the altar and holds hands.


HP: We are gathered here to in honor of X - our sister, our friend, as she makes the

transition to a new chapter in her life. Two has become one. And we, her family of

spirit, are here to embrace her and welcome her as she becomes the many.


(Facing the north, all begin to stomp as fast or as slow as they wish)


Hail to the North

Hail to the Earth beneath our feet

Hail to the deep root and rock

We call upon you to ground us


(Stomp rapidly for a couple seconds, then stop)


(HP turns to the East)

(All begin to whistle quietly, as slow or as fast as they wish)


Hail to the East

Hail to the Air moving around us

Hail to the breath and the wind

We call upon you to lift our spirits


(Whistle loudly for a few seconds, then stop)


(HP turns to the South)


(All begin to hum)


Hail to the South

Hail to the Fire in our spirits

Hail to the flame and light

We call upon you to ignite our hearts


(Hum loudly for a few seconds, then stop)

(HP turns to the West)


(All begin to tap their hands on their legs, like the sound of rain)


Hail to the West

Hail to the Water of our soul

Hail to the wisdom and cleansing rain

We call upon you to heal our beings


(Tap on legs for a few seconds, then stop)


(HP faces the altar)


HP: Now we call upon the Goddess Kwan Yin

Lady of many names

One Who Hears the Cries of the World

Goddess of Compassion

Goddess of Friendship

Goddess of Healing

We open our hearts to you

We ask for your healing presence

We ask that you gift our sister, X, with your blessing



The circle is cast

Our work can begin


(HP spends a few moments mentioning how they know X and perhaps

reflect on the ending that has occurred.)


X, you are our sister and our friend

You are our family

We stand beside you

We support you.

Come forth and cut your past free - release the part of you that no longer serves a

purpose. That holds you back from all you can be on your own.


X comes forward and take the picture of them with their ex, and cuts

themselves out of the photo. They then light the remainder of the photo and

state:


I am free

I stand on my own


And tosses the flaming bit into the cauldron. X then takes the photo of

themselves and glues it to the center of the poster board.


X either holds the cauldron or stands behind it, as each friend comes up

and cuts out their image, burning the background and states:


The past is the past

It is all in the background

What remains is our friendship


They then glue their photo around X’s and state:


You may stand on your own

But you are not alone

I am with you


They then return to the circle and the next person proceeds as above.

When all are done:


HP:

Kwan Yin, goddess of wishes and healing

We are here to ask you to bless X

We now will drink tea that is sacred to Kwan Yin, and create a lotus blossom of

hope and light.

Each person shall, on the white side of the paper, draw or right a blessing or wish

of healing.

Relax, make merry, and get creative!


X walks around and hands a cup of tea to each person, as they begin to

work on their origami lotuses. Messages can be as long or a short as they like

- pictures can be drawn as well.

When all are done, each person lays the blossom, one at a time, before the

collage of photos and states:


X, I ask Kwan Yin to bless and heal you


At this point, X can say a few words if they like - about moving forward, or

friendship, or whatever they feel they need to get off their chest. Then they

will be the one to close the circle.


X:

Kwan Yin

You have blessed us with your presence

You have filled my heart with light

You have set my feet on the path of healing

I thank you for honoring us

Until we meet again

Farewell


Spirits of the West

Spirits of Water

You have blessed us with healing

Until we meet again

Farewell


Spirits of the South

Spirits of Fire

You have blessed us with passion

Until we meet again

Farewell


Spirits of the East

Spirits of Air

You have blessed us with inspiration

Until we meet again

Farewell


Spirits of the North

Spirits of Earth

You have blessed us with certainty

Until we meet again

Farewell


(X then thanks the group in their own words)

The photo collage and the lotuses are kept by X to remind them that they

are never alone.


Link to Origami Lotus here




32 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Comments


bottom of page